What The Crap Is Wrong With Men These Days???!!!

The dude, makes some valid points.  Follow the jump for details.

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Question:  “What the crap is wrong with men these days???!!!”

I wasn’t going to answer this question because it’s like Courtney Love on the weekends, loaded.  But I will.  It’s the purpose of this blog, my “cause” which I will explain later.  I believe what’s wrong with men “these days” is there is lack of them.  I know many boys but only a few men.  I also admit I did not have my rite of passage until recently.  I was on the other side of the great divide most of my life.  Okay, so what’s the difference between a boy and a man?  Penis size of course.  Joke.  I can only give you my opinion, what I think are the main differences.  There are three.

First, boys react.  Men respond.  37 years on this planet observing brothers, fathers, and male friends have taught me that they generally do not think about how their words/actions will effect others nor how it will define their character.  How they appear to the world is not important to them.  They break hearts and faces because they can.  They liter, cheat, and steal.  They assassinate their wives’ character and verbally vomit on their children.  It takes discipline, patience, and maturity to be metacognitive (to think about your thoughts), to filter yourself, to put others before you.  A response takes thought.  Reactions are instinctual.  Boys react.  Men respond.

Second, men walk with mirrors.  Boys do not.  This means they look at themselves.  They are aware of their defects and not afraid to explore them.  They are transparent and non-defensive.  You can tell who is a man by the way he argues.  He doesn’t.  He acknowledges and makes choices.  He takes responsibility, addresses feelings, reads subtext, and moves forward changed.

And finally, men have a cause.  Boys do not.  By cause, I mean they have something worth fighting for.  Back in the day, warriors sacrificed their lives for their cause.  A cause doesn’t necessarily mean war or world hunger.  A cause can be fighting for your marriage, your child, your position in life.  This blog is part of my cause – helping people with their relationships, addictions, and journeys, in anyway that I can.  When men have a cause, they become leaders.

But here’s the thing.  You need all three, respond not react, walk with mirrors, and have a cause.  You can be passionate about your cause and be a strong leader but if you’re not willing to look at yourself and be vulnerable, you’re just a dick.  Or you may really be in touch with who you are but without a cause, you’re a pussy.  Okay, sorry.  Enough of that.  I think you get the point.  It’s the combination of all three elements that I believe make you a man.  I also believe this combination is rare, which is why women like you are asking these questions.  What you are really saying is that your are frustrated because there are no good men out there.

I disagree.

There are few.

Find them.

It’s worth it.